Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Fundamentally opposed

Yesterday, after the transfer, AdventureBoy and I were sitting in the recovery room (me in the reclining comfy chair and he in the standard hospital room chair - as should be!), both staring into space, lost in our own thoughts.

All I could think about was PCM and why this cycle has progressed so differently. Wondering what chance she would have. Thinking about her speedy growth since Saturday and wondering whether that made her a fighter.

I turned to AB at one point, noticing his reverie, and asked mistily:

What are you thinking about?
(expecting some thoughtful comment on the new chance that we had just been presented with)

My 4pm appointment with Mrs and Mrs Cute Old Couple.
(turning to me earnestly)
Do you think you will be finished with Chinese Cutie Punk by then? I don't want to be late for them and let them down.


And there you have it ... the ingrained and absolutely fundamental difference between us and them. The ability to switch in and out at will. The ability to care but not obsess. The brain in which 'other things' take priority. The 'nothing can be done about it now' attitude. The ability to wait with patience.


I laughed. Are you serious?

Surprise in his eyebrows. Why? What's wrong?

Oh. nothing.


It's just, did he have to start thinking beyond it so soon?

18 Comments:

At 3:20 pm, Blogger Pixxiee said...

OMG...I read this out to my hubby and he had the grace to cringe a bit and then said "we can't help it!"...

LOL. Isn't it lucky we have wonderful women and bloggers in our lives who do "get" it?

 
At 5:00 pm, Blogger Bea said...

This is more or less on a par with Mr Bea's "It just doesn't feel any different to any other failed cycle" comment. (Referring to our first IVF cycle which, after having experienced actual - if subtle - pregnancy symptoms followed by a low positive hCG, went quickly down the drain. Yep, I didn't think it was much different either.)

But it wasn't said maliciously - just honestly.

Damnit, why so practical?

Bea

 
At 5:09 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear StellaNova, oh does that ever sound familiar. I have learned -- the hard way -- not to get my hopes up when I ask M that question in moments of import. Because he's usually thinking about something so trivial I want to kill him. You're right, it's ingrained.

I wish you all the best of luck for PCM. All available digits crossed!

 
At 9:15 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just catching up with where you're at, I'm so glad PCM is on board and may she catch up and surpass all expectations! Good luck!

 
At 10:41 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fingers, toes, legs and eyes crossed for PCM.

I don't know how men do it. I wish that I could get inside their heads for a little bit of time to see how they can not worry and stew and fret and obsess.

 
At 6:13 am, Blogger Emmie said...

Oh, I feel your frustration! I have learned not to ask H what he is thinking. It is usually so far removed from the enormity of the situation at hand. But men have thier own way of coping, I guess.

 
At 9:18 am, Blogger ColourYourWorld said...

Max is the same, he wont even blog about the process side of things. He is afraid of getting his hopes up only to fall miserably. That is the way he copes....not writing about it, even if he does think about it.

 
At 1:10 pm, Blogger Kris said...

I wish I had H's ability to compartmentalize. On the other hand, I wonder how he would function if he had to multi-task.

I missed yesterday. I hope PCM likes the decoration, too.

 
At 11:16 pm, Blogger Serenity said...

Men. J does the same thing.

I hope this is it for you... much love and stick vibes coming your way from me...

 
At 1:47 am, Blogger beagle said...

This post is so TRUE.

Also . . . GOOD LUCK!!!!!

 
At 12:20 pm, Blogger Mary Ellen and Steve said...

That sounds like something Steve would say.

Good luck! I hope that PCM is making himself nice and cozy.

 
At 9:21 pm, Blogger Courtney said...

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you and sending you lots of love and strength. Good luck!

 
At 7:10 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That ...ing bastard Rodriguez!
[URL=http://discount-prescription-drug.mlvma.com/canadian-discount-drug-prescription.html ] canadian discount drug prescription [/URL]
[URL=http://enfamil.uefhv.com/enfamil-sample.html ] enfamil sample [/URL]
[URL=http://impotence.uefhv.com/woman-impotence---.html ] woman impotence [/URL]
[URL=http://phentermine-adipex.mlvma.com/phentermine-adipex-ionamin.html ] phentermine adipex ionamin [/URL]
[URL=http://levitra-online.uefhv.com/book-com-guest-levitra-online-pansy-site---.html ] book com guest levitra online pansy site [/URL]
[URL=http://dental-laboratory.xffkv.com/x-ray-laboratory-medical-dental--.html ] x ray laboratory medical dental [/URL]
[URL=http://pharmacy-tech.uefhv.com/pharmacy-tech-board.html ] pharmacy tech board [/URL]
[URL=http://canada-drug.mlvma.com/canada-drug-from-online-prescription.html ] canada drug from online prescription [/URL]

What if they came in a vehicle?
http://lortab.xffkv.com/lortab-online-phentermine---.html lortab online phentermine
http://acyclovir.uefhv.com/acyclovir-during-pregnancy.html acyclovir during pregnancy
http://butalbital.mlvma.com/aspirin.html-butalbital-jerrjem-link-republika.pl.html aspirin.html butalbital jerrjem link republika.pl
http://pharmacy-tech.uefhv.com/hi-tech-pharmacy.html hi tech pharmacy

[LINK=http://drug-bust.mlvma.com ] drug bust [/LINK]

 
At 7:46 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a brother, a landlord, a master, she considered how many people's happiness were in his guardianship!
[URL=http://dental-health-lesson-plan.xffkv.com/dental-health-month-and-lesson-plan--.html ] dental health month and lesson plan [/URL]
[URL=http://paxil-prozac.xffkv.com/lexapro-paxil-prozac-zoloft.html ] lexapro paxil prozac zoloft [/URL]
[URL=http://definition-of-drug-abuse.uefhv.com/definition-of-drug-abuse--.html ] definition of drug abuse [/URL]
[URL=http://celebrex-drug-interaction.mlvma.com/celebrex-drug-interaction--.html ] celebrex drug interaction [/URL]
[URL=http://hydrocodone-m361.mlvma.com/hydrocodone-m361--.html ] hydrocodone m361 [/URL]
[URL=http://celebrex-cancer.mlvma.com/survival-rates-cancer.html ] survival rates cancer [/URL]
[URL=http://dental-implant-california.mlvma.com/dental-implant-southern-california--.html ] dental implant southern california [/URL]
[URL=http://health-dental-vision-insurance.xffkv.com/affordable-health-dental-and-vision-insurance--.html ] affordable health dental and vision insurance [/URL]

Was his engagement to Lucy an engagement of the heart?
http://dental-implant-atlanta.mlvma.com/atlanta-dental-implant---.html atlanta dental implant
http://dental-implant-illinois.mlvma.com/ dental implant illinois
http://drug-house-sex.uefhv.com/drug-house-sex--.html drug house sex
http://metro-dental-care.uefhv.com/ metro dental care

[LINK=http://beverly-hills-cosmetic-dental-surgery.uefhv.com ] beverly hills cosmetic dental surgery [/LINK]

 
At 9:17 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chilling the Last Heroes!
[URL=http://off-celexa.xffkv.com/how-to-taper-off-celexa.html ] how to taper off celexa [/URL]
[URL=http://steroid-use-in-professional-sports.mlvma.com/steroid-use-in-professional-sports--.html ] steroid use in professional sports [/URL]
[URL=http://advantage-care-dental.xffkv.com/discount-advantage.html ] discount advantage [/URL]
[URL=http://boston-dental-school.xffkv.com/boston-dental-school---.html ] boston dental school [/URL]
[URL=http://food-increase-testosterone.xffkv.com/ ] food increase testosterone [/URL]
[URL=http://drug-abuse-in-teen.mlvma.com/abuse-article-drug-teen.html ] abuse article drug teen [/URL]
[URL=http://cialis-com-drug.mlvma.com/cialis-cialis-com-cum-drug-generic-online-us-viagra.html ] cialis cialis com cum drug generic online us viagra [/URL]
[URL=http://herbs-alternative-medicine-health.xffkv.com/alternative-health-herb-medicine.html ] alternative health herb medicine [/URL]

Do you suppose them to be in London?
http://addiction-alcohol-drug-program-treatment.uefhv.com/mental-health-addiction.html mental health addiction
http://advantage-care-dental.xffkv.com/dental-health-plans---.html dental health plans
http://food-increase-testosterone.xffkv.com/food-that-increase-testosterone--.html food that increase testosterone
http://canada-drug-in-store.mlvma.com/canada-drug-store--.html canada drug store

[LINK=http://alprazolam-overnight-delivery.uefhv.com ] alprazolam overnight delivery [/LINK]

 
At 2:51 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, Elinor, how incomprehensible are your feelings!
[URL=http://bontril.uefhv.com/bontril-line--.html ] bontril line [/URL]
[URL=http://hydrocodone-online.mlvma.com/cod-hydrocodone-online.html ] cod hydrocodone online [/URL]
[URL=http://health-medicine.xffkv.com/disparity-health-medicine-multicultural.html ] disparity health medicine multicultural [/URL]

Gardiner?
http://drug-interaction.uefhv.com/drug-interaction-lipitor--.html drug interaction lipitor
http://buy-ultram.mlvma.com/cheap-ultram.html cheap ultram

[LINK=http://drug-sex.xffkv.com ] drug sex [/LINK]

 
At 3:07 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonderful and informative web site. I used information from that site its great. international merchant account quote pay per click program air car change filter 169 lcd tv Bingo cash free real win Can a suit jacket be let out viagra vs levitra http cheerleader.yoz.com archives Koss dvd player Lcm high school baseball stadium air purifiers uk uk one piece tv show theme caedmon&aposs call center aisle lyrics Mac os boot cd K&m air filters motor cycles Student loan consolidation fleet2920 Nhra rules convertibles Installig a dryer euro pro hepa filter shark ep033

 
At 1:50 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cool blog, interesting information... Keep it UP buying+rental+cars Acne scar revison Eczema home remedie Vehicle rental in teesside George polk truck rental automatic ice cream machines Information about seroquel west palm beach airport auto rentals

 

Post a Comment

<< Home